Its the nth interview I’ve done with patients after weeks of being interred at the Philippine General Hospital wards. It comes to me how differently people experience the condition of Depression. There are some who have been at the wards for weeks, close to a month. Others do not have themselves checked-in and simply come for the prescriptive drugs. And others who have tried to take their lives after weeks of hopelessness. What makes the experience of depression different from another ‘s experience? How is it that patient resolve is different when the intensity of the condition is the same? How does one come to choose whether to withdraw from life, take their lives, or keep engaging life? As a coach, the question is important as it informs my intervention plan.

After working extensively with different cases, I learned that emotional fitness is key. This fitness is developed through a 3 steps process: 1) realistic awareness of the current condition; 2) visualization that the situation can be improved; 3) development of a plan to bridge the gap.

Everybody needs a compelling future to survive a challenging situation. Everyone can take hardship, frustration, and failure if they know that working the situation will bring them success and victory in time. If one does not have a compelling vision for his life, he is at a loss because there is no reason to go through the pain. He loses direction because he has no roadmap to follow. Floundering and thrashing aimlessly, he burns out, energy giving out, because its impossible to be strong all the time.

Similarly, in the corporate space, if you do not have a vision for your career, you will work yourself to burn out. It is not possible to continually work long hours; take on streams of projects, and be 100% of the time switched on to the office politicks. The smarter way is to: 1) identify the position that you want to occupy and work from there. 2) Understand the politicks that will bring you that position, identify the relationships and cultivate the skills that are valuable to that position 3) then steadily market yourself by volunteering for the correct projects: presenting at the right meetings; appearing at the correct social events.

If you are working a 15 hour day everyday of the week and yet being beaten for the promotion by a the manager at the next table who goes home at 6PM, then its a sure bet you are doing something wrong. You definitely coach to help you get your career in the fast lane. Contact me and lets see if I can help you out.

The wards have a different energy. There is an over-hanging sense of sadness, despondency.  A wail far left, a whimpering cry in the corner,  babbled poetry from an accordioned bed, a love song sung mid-verse by a wavering out-of-tune voice.  The gurney rushes by with a patient restrained, doctors, nurses and caretakers in tow.

The greatest demand upon everyone  is to keep the  love alive when all are rendered helpless in the face of a  battered physique and broken spirt  of a loved one suffering from an impossible-to-understand mental condition. It is the deep love that the caregivers  provide that shines its ever faintest to lead the patient out of the dark; the deep love that gives families the strength to endure the life long ordeal of unrelenting service and dedication  to care and ‘see’ the person under the ravishes of the disease.  It take passion –intensely enthusiastic inexplicable love — for only those emotions can bully up the strength to succeed despite the  frequent failures, setbacks. It is this passion both from the patient and those that care that will eventually raise up the patient from darkness to regain and then become victorious in their second wind.

Similarly, it takes crazy love to succeed in the corporate world. That intensely enthusiastic, very empowered or infatuated passion for what you  do is the secret sauce to soar and stand out in the noisy workspace where everyone is gunning for that next promotion. It is not the long hours toiled or that intense research that brings the ideas for a new product or service or process flow. New ideas and insights come from passion —the love and interest for what we do. Passion goes beyond our conscious  understanding and short circuits to our intuition. Passion is a light from within, an inner intelligence that helps us make the complex simple;  It allows us to connect with our inner wisdom to identify ‘when things are just right.’ A baker cannot really explain ‘when the batter feels right’; a therapist cannot explain why ‘that thought is where most problems are generated’; the inventor cannot explain why he knows ‘that path will lead me to the solution quicker.’

Many people take a certain job because it ‘makes more sense as it pays more.’ They discount their talents in writing, singing, the arts, trading it in for project management, math, or marketing for that blue chip company. And then they fail. they flail forever in the dark, wandering from job to job, never happy and never quite making it. Why ? because there is a a real cost to not doing what fulfills.  That extra zing of secret sauce just never comes because it has been deadened. And so, many people wallow at low positions when then can be great if they only chose what their heart calls out for.

Coaching question: How can you configure your job such that you can use your unique set of talents, setting you apart from the herd? If you don’t know how to find it, a coach can help you do that.  Contact me anytime.

visual of Eternity’s gate is borrowed from art paintingartist.org